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New Albany, Indiana, United States

Monday, August 13, 2012

Have you ever felt like a lab rat?

That's what I am feeling like as of late. I know it takes a while sometimes for certain medications to work and for the side effects to wear off, but my goodness it ain't worth all of this. I was put on a new medication Thursday I believe. It was for my OCD because it was taking over my brain again and I couldn't put my worrisome thoughts to rest. So, I told the doctor I would give a try and honestly I did. I tried really hard. I wanted it to work, obviously. But, it didn't. It put me to sleep pretty quickly which was awesome. I slept through the night which was equally awesome. What was not so awesome is the next day side effects. Friday I woke up around 1PM I think and then went right back to sleep about 1:30PM and didn't wake back up until 4:30PM. When I did wake up I wanted to go right back to sleep but I couldn't because I had stuff to do. I felt like crap! So my MIL suggested the next night I cut the pill in half and take that. So, I gave that a shot. Same thing. Slept all day and felt like crap. Obviously after that I was done. I said forget it. So of course the past couple of nights I haven't slept well again. But I refuse to let what happened to me in April happen again. Although I am having sleep issues and dealing with my mom being gone and not going to be there to see me get married to my soul mate I am doing well overall.

I mean, my OCD is still there obviously and will continue to be until I find something that works for me and doesn't do weird crap to my body but I'll live with it for now. I lived with it this long, another few months isn't going to kill me.

On a much happier note. The wedding planning is coming together quite well. My dress is being altered currently by a great seamstress. Steve's wedding band came in today, mine should be here next week. My invitations are on the way. I've bought lots of things that we'll need for the wedding. I am feeling confident with everything that I am getting accomplished. I have 54 days until I say "I do" to my soul mate and I couldn't be happier!

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